Wednesday, December 20, 2006
secret post dated Nov27-
..i know he is a nice guy that cares for me. that is why i am worried that i may be fickle and hurt him. i really can't bring myself to let that happen. and yet after thinking so much recently, i can't help but fear that that day will come. it will come. but right now i am really happy when i'm with him. that's all that matters to me now. the present.there was once i said to someone, 'you came too late. this is all i've ever wished for for the past 2 years. but now its too late. you came too late. cos now my heart belongs to another.'-won't you say the same?
it seems that there is no more present.
my head's got this whirring sound all the time, it just makes me feel dizzy. running in the rain sure doesn't help much. watching him go makes things even worse. i just couldn't help but ...
i'm sure i can still live without him. cos yes, carol is a strong girl. she wants to protect herself from hurt. but it's just too painful. sometimes she needs someone to protect her too.
so cold and distant, he doesn't even dare to come near me.
bet he doesn't even dare to come here. to read this. ha! there's no use in feeling guilty. it doesn't change anything.
one thing that i have to count myself lucky about is that there wasn't some stupid letter. gosh. i really pity her. hope she's doing fine now.
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'do you trust me?' that's what you said and what i did. now there's not enough integrity for that to come out from you anymore.
12:47 PM
