Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Is it anything I did? To make me deserve all this shit I'm going through. Hate all these. And I hate myself for acting so stupid. Dumb. Childish. Whatever you wanna call it.
What have you done? To make all this happen. Why? How?
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Hey, if I start. Will you do all you can to change it?
La verdad, lastima.
12:56 AM
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Just needed to blog. Feelings give me the urge to. Helps me find peace. Many times I try to fight this urge, oh wells, need peace badly.
3.49AM
As I lay on my bed face down in my pillow trying to calm all emotions flowing out of me, I can feel eeyore beside me. When I looked up, eeyore is still the same old eeyore. Always sitting beside me, soft and cuddly with arms stretched open as though he's yelling hug me! As much as my heart wants to, my head just rejects the idea. I just don't. Instead, I give it a light kiss before I sleep every night.
Thinking about it now I just can't help but laugh a little especially remembering the note that comes with it. Gosh, it's just funny how ironic things can be. Please, I think I've had my fair share of ironies already.
Lately been doing things that I can never forgive myself for doing. Argh. Frustrating.
Think Mr Fever is gonna visit me, again. Shall let him have my panadols.
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bear hugs.
hug eeyore when u miss me.
4:02 AM
Sunday, October 07, 2007
Today was great! So decided to brighten up my blog for a change. If not it will look all boring and dull. -__-
Haha. First it was going out with becky! Really enjoy sister company man. We are such retarded morons at times. LOL. Shopped a little and bought a belt and cute little hairclips. Sadly, I had to have fever halfway and felt really exhausted after only combing one storey of far east plaza. Weak man. Managed to finish 3 floors before seeking refuge at subway. Then becky went to meet guan yu and I, zk. Grabbed some panadols on the way. Felt better after seeing zk and gobbling panadols. Ate a little, rot a little and bought something for Pape! Hee. Feel proud about it. =) Shall save the rest of the money! I wanna go diving!!!
After that, zk and I headed off to the west! Took bus and on the way there something really embarassing happened. Stupid zk have to tell the whole world! Bish. Haha. But it was really funny. I was practically grinning and frowning half the bus ride. Grr.
In the end, wy gang and us were chilling and Liquid Kitchen. Was quite fun just rotting and relaxing and laughing. Past week was really getting quite stressful. Gosh! Tml I have to continue studying man! -___- Oh well, at least I enjoyed myself today. Grinz.
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Feeling grateful.
3:44 AM
Saturday, October 06, 2007
Every month I do the same thing. Just except for this one. It's such a sad story to tell. I guess, there are no fairy tales in the real world after all. Carol just has to accept that. I'm gonna have to stand on my own two feet as there can never be someone that I can lean and depend on, at least not forever. Though, I've always believed and hoped otherwise. Up till now, I still want to. To believe.
Why is that so?
I still can't help but grieve about this sad fact.
These few weeks, I've learnt with much hurt that I must become stronger. This belief made my days brighter.
Gosh, I can't really explain all my feelings and thoughts right now. There is really too many, and it's too complex. Anyway, for some reason or other, I can't exactly pen down everything over here. I just hope everything will turn out great and that I can be the strong me again.
Cheers for Carol.
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You can never prove me wrong.
Cause you won't.
1:26 AM
